At Allegro, we have been encouraging Open Snack and Family Style Dining for many years; it is our belief that creating a healthy relationship with eating starts in the earliest stages of life. Mealtimes in early learning environments are about so much more than food. They’re about connection, autonomy, trust, and learning
With the new updates to Nova Scotia Food and Nutrition in Early Learning and Child Care Programs, we have been revisiting the importance of a responsive feeding environment.
What Is Responsive Feeding?
Responsive feeding is a respectful, relationship-based approach to supporting children’s eating habits. It means tuning into children’s cues and supporting their autonomy, while still providing structure and consistency around food.
According to the Nova Scotia Food and Nutrition in Early Learning and Child Care Programs, responsive feeding involves:
- Adults providing healthy food at predictable times in a supportive environment
- Children deciding how much to eat, what to eat from what is offered, and whether to eat at all
This shared responsibility helps children develop body awareness, self-regulation, and a lifelong healthy relationship with food.
Why Family-Style Dining Matters
Family-style dining is recognized as a best practice in early learning settings. It’s more than just sitting at a table, it’s about creating a space where children feel included, respected, and empowered.
In family-style meals:
- Children serve themselves using child-sized utensils
- Educators eat alongside children, modelling healthy behaviours and conversation
- The focus is on connection, not control or coercing children to eat
This approach offers countless developmental benefits:
- Autonomy: Children choose what and how much to eat
- Language and social skills: Conversations flow naturally around the table
- Fine motor development: Scooping, pouring, and serving are practical life skills
- Self-regulation: Children learn to listen to their hunger and fullness cues
Where We Sometimes Go Off Track
In the effort to keep things simple or efficient, it’s easy to default to practices that reduce children’s involvement in mealtimes – like pre-plating food, deciding portion sizes, or encouraging children to “just try a bite.”
While well-intentioned, these approaches can:
- Add pressure to eating
- Undermine children’s natural ability to regulate their intake
- Shift the focus to eating to please rather than listening to their body
What Children Learn When We Let Go of Pressure
When we trust children to listen to their bodies and give them real choices at the table, they:
- Explore new foods without pressure
- Develop confidence and independence
- Learn to stop eating when they feel full
- Feel respected and in control of their bodies
And yes, they may not eat much one day, but they may eat everything in sight the next. That’s normal. When we stay consistent and calm, children learn to trust the process too.
Creating a Responsive Mealtime Environment
Use these simple principles to support responsive feeding and family-style dining in your setting or home:
The Adult’s Role:
- What is offered: Provide a variety of nutritious foods
- When to eat: Offer 3 meals and 2–3 snacks at consistent times each day
- Where to eat: Create a calm, inviting and distraction-free space where you sit and eat together
The Child’s Role:
- What they eat: From the foods you provide
- How much they eat: They listen to their hunger and fullness cues
- Whether they eat at all: They are in control of their own bodies
If a child refuses to eat, let them know you’ll save their food to revisit later.
What We’re Seeing Now
Since re-committing to responsive feeding and family-style dining, the changes have been powerful:
- Children are more engaged at the table
- Mealtimes are calmer and more connected
- Children are trying new foods out of curiosity, not pressure
- Conversations are richer – children are asking questions, making requests, and enjoying the social side of eating
- Children are engaged in the meal prep– setting the table, preparing food, passing foods to each other
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